In the Beginning

Ahhh, yes, it's my favorite week of the year - the week that I get to face the Dark Lord of the Underworld himself (or as I like to call him, 'Daddy'). This year, it's going to be a key battle - The Dark Lord (aka "That One") is sitting atop the Bad Division at 4-2 and The Chosen One is clinging desperately to the top of the Phuqa Division at 5-1.

I enjoyed immensely that you've started two players against your defense Chad. That may be the only thing I have going for me this week, since 90% of my team is here in the infirmary with me. You've started Big Ben against me, which means I must watch the Steelers game today and try to hope that we score a lot without it being Ben. Invariably, there will be a flurry of "Yes!" with each touchdown, followed quickly by a "Fuck, that's against me!" I also love that we both have such powerhouse WRs - all I can say is thank god return yards count.

In the end, I'm pretty sure Chad will get the best of me - Reggie is hurt and my new hero Steve Breaston (even though he is undoubtedly a Michigan faggot) is off this week, which means my chance of winning will come down solely to my defenses - either the Patriots against Denver (they've scored a whopping 3 fantasy points in their last 2 games against shitty teams like Miami) or the Sex Panthers against run n' shoot masters New Orleans who usually put up about 42 points a game. Great. Nice vic, Chad.

WWST Game of the Week: Guessy Bessie's Beverly Hills Bimbos (1-5) vs. Bullett for My Commissioner (2-4). In the battle of Christ, I Can't Watch, realize first that someone here must win. But who's it gonna be? Looking at these rosters, it's hard to figure out why each team doesn't have at least one or two more wins each. Bess has lost 4 games by 10 points or less, and two of those by just a single point. JEWnior lost four in a row sandwiched between his two victories, and despite scoring just fine himself those weeks, he ran into teams that scored 197, 180 and 201 in three of those weeks. Ouch. Both of these bad luck banditas could be better than they are, but they're not, and for one, the bad luck will continue. Looking at the lineups, I think it comes down to the defenses and QBs - Peyton vs. Brad Johnson and the Giants at home vs the Jets in the Black Hole. Gotta go with Bess on this one.